I shop at Tesco. Yes, I’m probably not the multi-millionaire rock star who gets food delivered by Ocado you thought I was. What’s dangerous about me shopping at Tesco is that I’m easily swayed by promotions and offers.

So in that spirit of things I came across a stand of cutlery by Alessi that if you have 5 vouchers, you can get up to 80% off! So over time I collected my five vouchers and had my heart set on a set of dessert cutlery because eating cake with a dinner fork is just… not cool yeah?

So I picked up the box and bought the set for £4.99 and with the rest of my shopping done, I went home. Now this is where the blonde moment kicks in. I failed to notice three crucial things about the item I had just bought:

1. The size of the box
2. The weight of the box
3. The fact the box said “THREE PIECE SET”

So why on earth, when I opened the box, did I expect to find enough cutlery to feed three people? Three piece set means a fork, spoon and knife. Not three sets of forks, spoons and knives. Schoolboy error. So if I do invite people over for dinner, we’ll have to take turns to eat our dessert. But in what order? Alphabetical order is iffy as my surname begins with ‘K’ so there’s a chance I’m in for a wait whilst my alphabetically superior friends eat dessert before me. Height order? Well I’m 5 foot 7 and my work nickname is ‘Bilbo’ so unless I invite the union members from Charlie’s Chocolate factory round for tea, I’m stuffed – or not as the case may be.

No, this is far too difficult to sort out. I have no option but to collect vouchers and buy the remaining 3 settings of cutlery bringing about a total cost of £19.96. Bargain.